“Notes to Myself – My sturggle to become a person ” by Hugh Prather.
I got this book some 7-8 years back. The title appealed me the most and led me to select the name of the blog on the title. But I had to select another as “Notes to myself” has been adopted by many bloggers.
In the morning while having the breakfast I was reading this small book and I come across with this passage and it seems to have been written by me, written for me, it simply refelcts my state of mind.
When I first began trying to be myself, I at times felt trapped by my feelings. I through that I was stuck with feelings I had, that I couldn’t change them, and should’nt try to even if I could. I saw many negative feelings inside me that I didn’t want, and yet I felt that I must express them if I were going to be myself.
Since then I have realized that my feelings do change and that I can have a hand in changing them. They chage simply by my becoming aware of them. When I acknowledge my feelings they become more positive. And they change when I express them. For example, if I tell a man that I don’t like him, I usally like him better.
The second thing I have realized is that my not wanting to express a negative feelings is a feeling itself, a part of me, and if I want not to express the negative feeling more than I do, then I will be acting more like myself by not expressing it.
Another line which hit me very hard ….
My trouble is I analyze life instead of live it